What it looks like:

Your child refuses to sit on the toilet or seems anxious about using it.

Why it happens:

The toilet can feel big, noisy, and unfamiliar compared to a potty.

What can help:

• Use a toilet seat reducer so they feel secure
  
• Let them watch you or an older sibling use the toilet
  
• Introduce it gradually, sitting fully clothed at first
  
• Keep the environment calm and pressure-free

What it looks like:

Your child prefers the potty and resists switching to the toilet.

Why it happens:

They’re comfortable with what they know and may not see a reason to change.

What can help:

• Keep both options available during the transition
  
• Try the toilet at consistent times (e.g. before bath or bed)
  
• Celebrate small wins without forcing the switch
  
• Use familiar routines to build confidence

What it looks like:

More frequent accidents after starting toilet use.

Why it happens:

It’s a new skill, and coordination and timing take practice.

What can help:

• Stay calm and reassuring
  
• Avoid punishment or pressure
  
• Keep spare clothes easily accessible
  
• Gently remind them to try regularly

What it looks like:

Your child avoids flushing or gets upset by the sound.

Why it happens:

The noise and sudden movement can feel overwhelming.

What can help:

• Let them leave the room before flushing
  
• Flush after they’re comfortable
  
• Turn it into a predictable part of the routine
  
• Show them how it works in a calm way

What it looks like:

Refusing to use toilets when out of the house.

Why it happens:

Public toilets can feel unfamiliar, loud, and less private.

What can help:

• Bring a portable toilet seat or potty option
  
• Prepare them in advance for where you’re going
  
• Choose quieter facilities when possible
  
• Keep a consistent routine when out

What it looks like:

Your child suddenly starts having accidents again after doing well.

Why it happens:

Changes like starting nursery, travel, or routine shifts can affect confidence.

What can help:

• Go back to basics temporarily
  
• Keep routines predictable
  
• Offer reassurance rather than pressure
  
• Give them time to rebuild confidence
  

What it looks like:

Your child avoids going to the toilet or holds it in.

Why it happens:

They may feel unsure, uncomfortable, or anxious about using the toilet.

What can help:

• Encourage relaxed, regular toilet sits
  
• Avoid rushing or forcing
  
• Watch for signs they need to go
  
• Seek advice if it continues or causes discomfort

What it looks like:

They’re confident during the day but still need nappies at night.

Why it happens:

Night-time dryness develops separately and often later.

What can help:

• Treat daytime and night-time training as separate stages
  
• Use waterproof bedding and plan ahead
  
• Avoid pressure around night-time dryness
  
• Focus on building confidence during the day first